As most of you have had to find out the hard way (and by “hard” i mean difficult, not “viagra-infused”), unless I have had my harem of semi-nude turkish boys fan me to consciousness and tickle my “nose” with their round, firm purple “grapes” , I won’t get out of bed. Or in the words of supermodel Linda Evangelipstick “I will not get out of bed for less than a 10,000 botox shots.” So, like, yeah. What a bitch. Hmmm… where was I going with it? Oh yeah, the environment. (I urge you to try sealing every argument you make with “AND it’s green-friendly”, it will do wonders for your listeners. Imagine this: “Officer , I was only stalking Michael Phelps because he’s dreamy… and I was trying to save trees by cutting back on the lilac-scented stationary I would have used to mail him my panties and a wedding ring. I’m being green-friendly!”)
But anyway, until you have picked up on my brilliance, here is something for you chew on (and by “chew” I mean “think”, as in “I think I will stalk Michael Phelps today”): next Thursday, September 4th, the International Summer Social will take place. Organized by the sexy people over at the Chicago Sister Cities, the event–to be held at rooftop of Gallery 37 Center for the Arts–invites reps from Chicago’s 27 Sister City Committees and Chicago-based international business execs. While Michael Phelps will not be present (he normally takes a nap from 5:30-6:00p.m. and then takes about a half hour to get out of bed, call his friends Jenny and Mark and consumes a live elephant for dinner, I heard), just about anyone with culture, class and sophistication will. Tickets are $20, so to RSVP please email Phillip.Svehla@cityofchicago.org.
To learn more about my superficial profundity, click here.
Another day in Chicago, naturally.